Giving Credit

Recently after a discussion regarding intellectual property, someone mentioned that yoga, being thousands of years old, is in the public domain.  As the prevalence of meditation apps, trademarked “mindfulness” programs, and other corporately driven initiatives grows, so does my mixed feelings on the way we value the work of our yoga teachers, both ancient and currently living, and what impacts that will have on the future of yoga - and our individual paths.

After years in the music industry, along with time spent in roles as an advocate for the arts, I have a good understanding of the way that commerce (or capitalism) works when it comes to intellectual property and copyright law (although I hold no professional designation as a lawyer, just experience working with and for a lot of folks with intellectual property rights).  

Pre-covid I recall having conversations about instructors lifting sequences from other teachers, using delivery methods, cues and sayings without mentioning or crediting the person where they drew the inspiration from.  

I had a bunch of different thoughts when hearing these conversations (all of which I will revisit and revise later):

“Yoga is in the public domain”

“The teachings are the teachings, they all come from the same source” (oh so problematic!)

“Why would I need credit? My ego is not who I am.” (yeah thinking is a weird thing sometimes)

Although yoga is within the public domain, a certain high profile hot yoga teacher tried to get his sequence copyrighted which the courts deemed not possible to copyright - however they did find that “You can’t copyright an idea, but you can copyright the expression of that idea.” - meaning the words, images etc… (source is linked).

That last thought really got me thinking...

When COVID-19 made group activities including yoga a digitally rendered service (for the most part) the presence of digitally administered “mindfulness” seemed to be inescapable. At first glance you might think “How else am I going to practice if studios are closed - don’t you think it’s great that apps are offering mindfulness and meditation to folks no matter where they are.”  Looking only at the surface this seems like an amazing innovation, especially when apps are free (or a combination of free and paid) but in my opinion there is an underlying cost - and it comes at the expense of the teacher.  The teacher is the one creating the words and images that I (again - not a lawyer) would argue IS likely copyrightable.

“But isn’t yoga a spiritual practice disinterested in material wealth?”

“But aren’t yoga teachers traditionally teaching yoga for free?  Don’t real yoga teachers go unpaid”

“But on the spiritual path, aren’t we aiming to let go of our need for acknowledgement?”

If you said those things I think you would be correct - but the reality remains that where I teach, where the revenue of apps go to, are capitalist societies that do not support the traditional ways of teaching (or practicing) that are founded on a donations based infrastructure established by the surrounding community.  Teachers are only able to clothe, shelter and feed themselves from the money that comes from their teaching (and in most cases this isn’t even enough to support them outright.  Most teachers are able to support them or they have jobs that take care of their basic needs because it’s the only way they’re able to teach and meet their needs - myself included). (Source Linked)

A free meditation website came to my attention via an influx of supportive students asking me to add my voice to their app based library of meditations.  I had some work pre-recorded so I went to the app to see what the deal was (ever aware of my prior experiences as a musician with IP rights…) I was shocked when the app declared the “non-exclusive right to use and make derivative works without credit or payment in perpetuity”.  Basically, give us your work and we’ll take it, do what we like with it and you get “exposure” (not entirely sure how that works given that in-theory they can make derivatives without compensation but I digress…).  Nevermind that part of being a teacher is being a perpetual student… something you’re required to pay for to access training and teachers in the system of capitalism.  Nevermind that you’ve paid for equipment to allow you to record yourself (whether it’s a phone or a computer - it requires a healthy dose of financial privilege to be able to afford these tools).  Not to mention the app decides in this instance that it deserves to get paid for that content but not the person that made it.

“freely giving it to a company to use it for what it wants to make money… an aim not on the spiritual path… just doesn’t sit right with me”

Also… yoga isn’t really ours to give to these corporations.  I’m not of the culture of yoga - this practice came from people of colour, it’s a major part of a culture that still exists to this day.  So freely giving it to a company to use it for what it wants to make money… an aim not on the spiritual path… just doesn’t sit right with me (but I’m not saying that’s reason enough to agree with me - you have your own reasons).

They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery but I’m reluctant to apply this to the current climate of yoga. 

I couldn’t help but come back to that question “Why would I need credit? My ego is not who I am.”  For me at least, I think likely if you don’t get credit, someone else will.

“leaving room for folks to take credit - and therefore control - the resources and the practice itself is a potential impact I think is good to be aware of.”

As a younger teacher I didn’t totally understand this. I taught concepts that I learned without referencing the source, I drew inspiration without necessarily pointing to where it came from.  This is not only racist when it comes to profiting from the labour of IBPOC, but leaving room for folks to take credit - and therefore control - the resources and the practice itself is a potential impact I think is good to be aware of.  

Maybe this is my own 2020 echo chamber - but in noticing the monetization of an industry (again industry applying to a spiritual tradition is just super weird) worth in excess of $85 Billion and looking around at local establishments and independent teachers like myself talk openly about the financial hardships they endure, I wonder how this fiscal pressure edits yoga down into what sells versus what it is - a multigenerational spiritual tradition that has a physical component.

More plainly - this lack of credit is a form of plagiarism.  In the case of the apps, this plagiarism is at least in theory consented to (depending on whether or not you read the fine print before uploading…).   If teachers are mimicking without crediting or citing, without reflecting or considering (as I once did), in a society in the midst of a raised awareness of how implicit bias oppresses many so few may flourish I wonder if this commonplace practice of not crediting benefits mostly teachers of privilege able to navigate an industry.

Asteya or non-stealing is part of the Yamas, a set of ethical principles that are on the yogic path from Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras. As yoga is a path to liberation from suffering, the sutras say

33. When the idea of stealing comes, non-stealing should be thought of.

In the case of not crediting, not paying for, not giving back to -- aren’t we also not being  truthful (Satya, a Niyama - or virtue meaning Truthfulness from the same scripture)? Aren’t we also allowing the illusion that you did it yourself to persist? What i’ve noticed is with repetition your ego starts to believe that what’s not yours actually is. 

In line with the verse above, what if when we’re inspired to take someone’s influence into our work, why not practice giving back to that person?  Why don’t we foster our own community by giving back to it?

Why not give credit, payment, support etc… ?  

Why not remind our egos of their place? (even when we DO get credit we are caretakers and guides — not owners of yoga)

Why not support another teacher’s teaching if they’re inspiring you? 

Myself,  I realize that my fears of “not being enough” clouded the issue, my willingness to further suffering by not getting or giving credit or pay to folks who have influenced me.  Regardless of what your answers are, it’s good to examine and reflect on why you do or don’t do things when it comes to your practice on and off the mat.

So if you’re not giving credit, pay, or support to the folks who support your teaching, ask yourself why and see what comes up.  

(Please don’t substitute my opinions for your own.  My own opinions and teachings evolve over time as I also learn, unlearn and grow. I offer this as critical thought but I do ask if you are inspired by me and get paid to be - give me a shout out, k?).

Don’t wait to do the work.

I taught a yoga class quite some time ago at a studio where I ended class saying Namaste with a completely appropriated translation of the word from a western yoga training I had taken not long before (“the light in me” version that you see plastered literally everywhere).  A student approached me afterward and called me in on my definition. They told me that what I had said was a westernized definition (aka culturally appropriated) and pointed me in the direction of seeking out more information. 

I remember writing down the podcast they recommended with full intention of listening to it (I couldn’t find it - I’ll edit the post if I do) and tucking it away for a few days for reasons that in retrospect are bullshit and racist (bs because they all deprioritized honouring yoga’s roots which are practices of people of colour - something I *thought* I was committed to at the time and centered my own white western person feelings.) 

They had returned to my class again and embarrassingly I hadn’t done the work of listening to that podcast and educating myself before they returned. I told them I had downloaded it but hadn’t listened to it yet for aforementioned retrospectively bullshit reasons. I don’t remember how I ended that class or if I did. I listened to the podcast on my way home from teaching. I changed my namaste definition before the next class I taught and it’s been that way since. 

Before I could change my class ending or educate myself I can tell you I never saw that student again. Didn’t matter that I did it - the delay said enough. Too late.

That student taught me the honourable action is also the immediate one when it comes to impact.

For years behind closed doors as a teacher, I’ve had similar conversations with limited impact. I accepted  minor concessions as “progress” - it wasn’t. I can see that now.  

My ego clouded my thinking in by staying in these spaces and being present I could make a difference - I can see clearly now I wasn’t.  

As I’ve been doing a lot of listening the past few weeks, reflecting on my own privledge, actions (and inactions), and looking forward to the future. I’ve revisited this story and I realize there was another lesson I had yet to learn.

Now I realize absence can be as powerful of a teacher as presence - particularly when people profit (either in cash or labour or energy) from your presence.

I am watching spaces continually being called in to take action on issues of racism and racial justice within their business model, their community, their classes, their teachers and their practices. 

Some are taking immediate action while they make mistakes, some say now is not the time does not feel right for them.

If now isn’t the time for you, I’m not here for it.

Changes to Online Offerings During Physical Distancing

I took some time to reflect this week while I was out (and make some memes but I digress) and I’m excited to say I’m adapting my online offerings to give you a better experience (and also to better support myself and my family during this time).

So here goes…

PWYC Classes:

I’m reducing my Pay What You Can Offerings on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube to once a week Yin While You’re In (Wall Edition). I want to continue to support your ability to remain calm, improve headspace and promote connection to a bigger whole. I will continue to leave a class or two up for you to support you in the interim. All PWYC classes will stream simultaneously on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube if technology co-operates. Pre-Register here to let me know you’re coming!

Online Public Classes via Zoom:

I’m now offering streaming classes via Zoom at $12 per class. I’ll be adding a Mid-day 30 minute Meditation class and Hatha Vinyasa Class (45 min slow sequence designed to help you feel strong) to give you more options. My schedule will be updated bi-weekly as I’m trying to stay true to what energy I have to give and accommodate my family’s needs during this weird ass time.

View the Schedule and Book a Class

Private and Semi-Private Class Bookings:

Did you know that I offer virtual lessons privately? I’ve been teaching via Skype one on one for years and now I’ve expanded my offering to semi-private lessons for your workplace, benched sports team or family if you’re looking for something specific.

Book an online private or semi-private class.

I’m wading into uncharted territory like many teachers out there - I’ve gone from instructing to instructing AND video and audio recording (and editing), running an online studio, and teaching classes live as a solo show pony in just one month (!).

There have been smooth days, not so smooth days, set backs (editing sucks), and fear but I’m up to be challenged in new ways (even though I’m nervous AF).

I also have to acknowledge how extremely privileged I am at even being able to offer any classes online. If I didn’t have access to equipment, tech skills and services this would not be happening - let alone as a one person operator.

My valued students who show up and keep me inspired. You teach me SO much - I’m so grateful to have you choose me as your teacher when you show up to class.

My valued donors and supporters - I couldn’t keep doing this without you. I’m just so grateful for your support. I can support myself because you support me - and I can’t tell you enough how much I appreciate it.

Thank you to @rachellewintzen @chi_junky for taking my calls, supporting my classes and having me be a part of this amazing community you’ve created.

Thank you to @yyoga_toronto for all the friends, students and community that continue to be there throughout this wild wild ride. I can’t wait to walk in those doors off queen (and be a little out of breath from the TTC being late) once again.

Support Studios in the 6ix

If there’s something you want to see - drop me a line! I love hearing from you.

See you on the yin side…

Examining Anger and Criticism in Yoga

Photo: Daniel Baylis

Arbitrary Perceptions of “Negativity”

“My dear friend, I may be the victim of wrong perceptions, and what I write here may not reflect the truth. However, this is my experience of the situation. This is what I really feel in my heart. If there is anything wrong in what I write, let us sit down and look into it together”

― Thich Nhat Hanh

I overheard a conversation between two teachers at a yoga studio early into my teaching days.  I forget the context of the conversation but one was clearly mad at the other about a critique of some kind.  They veiled their anger under thick flowery language like wolves in sheep’s soft downy clothing but it didn’t stop them from making biting remarks.  One of them didn’t like the other one’s “energy,” the other didn’t “feel” that her language was “yogic.” They spent about 5 minutes hurling Patanjali and Buddha at one another, which only increased the tension.  I don’t know why they felt so compelled to try to disguise their anger and criticisms of eachother… but I walked away with the feeling that they wanted their calm to seem impenetrable… even if it was an illusion. 

This passive aggressive tendency is a pattern that’s revealed itself to me over my years of teaching and I wonder why it is that we think that keeping our anger out of plain sight makes us any more calm, or any more enlightened.   What I notice is at large, the yoga community arbitrarily will encourage unpleasant sensations like crying (it’s healing!), laughing (it’s releasing!), sadness (it’s a part of life!) I find it so interesting that yoga spaces in the west will make space for anything… unless it’s considered “negative” - like anger, criticism or plain ol’ not feeling positive or happy.  

Negativity has become a yoga taboo.  We’ve banished it as something to be “avoided”, “controlled”, “weak minded” or something that just makes us less than. The truth is we will encounter anger on the spiritual path.  We’ll have times where we’re criticized in life. When we label things like anger, criticism as negative without fully considering their value or purpose we don’t give ourselves the opportunity to learn from them.   So let’s examine them…

Anger

“When anger manifests in us, we must recognize and accept that anger is there and that it needs to be tended to. At this moment we are advised not to say anything, not to do anything out of anger. We immediately return to ourselves and invite the energy of mindfulness to manifest also,”

― Thich Nhat Hanh

Omitting anger from yoga spaces has lead to niche practices where angry yogis are encouraged to yell, swear, and scream their way to peace.  While there’s a place for this practice in the yoga sphere, I wonder if anger need not be siloed out of sight in separate classes. If we can make space to be ok with feeling or being present around anger (instead of shoving it aside or identifying with it) we might learn why being around this emotion makes us so uncomfortable.

Anger, like all emotions, is trying to draw something to attention.  As it relates to modern chakra and energy theory, anger is associated with fire. This comes up in our physical experience of anger (“hot under the collar”), our awareness by shedding light on what we need to work through, and getting us to act (“lighting a fire under our asses”), and then using anger to get us to change or transform out of our current situation (so we can let our anger go).

When we don’t acknowledge when something makes us angry - we’ll get stuck in our anger, identify with it, and in turn allow it to burn in the background eating away at us.  We’re not “angry people” for feeling angry - we’re people experiencing anger for a time. Once anger has shown us where to move to, what we might need to work through, and act accordingly. While it’s true we need to let anger go so it doesn’t cause harm, we can’t rush ourselves or others to the “let go” stage. It needs to happen in its own time. While it’s important in some cases not to act from a place of anger, eventually - like anything we accumulate, we’ll need to deal with it.  If we’re taught to avoid, we’re not going to deal.

I wonder if in the case of the yoga teachers above, if one of those teachers had acknowledged it - “Hey when you do x that really makes me angry because…” what kind of common ground or greater understanding they might have gotten to instead of seeing this emotion as making them a lesser yogi. Just because you feel angry sometimes, doesn’t make you an angry yogi!

Criticism

“Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.”

– Winston Churchill

For my purposes here I’m defining criticism as “the analysis and judgment of the merits and faults of a literary or artistic work”.

A recent trend against criticism I’ve noticed in the teaching community is that there is “no wrong way to teach yoga.”  Well… sorry I would have to disagree. If your students can’t understand your directions, aren’t safe or don’t meet your students where they’re at - that’s not the way to teach them. A much more accurate statement is “there are many ways to teach yoga” or that “there are as many paths to yoga as there are practitioners” or that “there is no perfect teacher”.  Critique allows us to improve as teachers by seeing our teaching or practice from a different perspective.

As teachers, we are community leaders and we have to be open to what members of our community have to say in order to serve them. Shutting down criticism is closing off to a whole lot of opportunity to learn and improve by engaging in this dialogue and learning what communities need. Not to mention as teachers we command a certain level of power while leading a class and absolutely that power should get checked often and openly. While I approach teaching yoga as a highly subjective, personal, and practical artform - I realise that not unlike any art, taking a critical look at yoga will help you better understand it, yourself and your way of relating to it just by looking at it from someone else’s perspective.

That perspective shift doesn’t just apply to teachers either - I would highly encourage students to engage in critical thought in any yoga class to gain a bigger perspective.  Instead of ending your questioning at “I don’t agree with this that or the other” or “that doesn’t serve me” see what happens when you delve deeper into “why.”  Blindly following any teacher will leave you vulnerable to their limitations - you’re your own best teacher when you critique, reflect and question to gain a higher perspective and awareness of yourself.  

In offering criticism, remember that your perspective is not an absolute either. Critique itself doesn’t make one party wrong and the other right but it can be a means of checking in on the perspective that you hold.  Not necessarily identifying with what you’ve found - meaning you’re are not your flaws, mistakes or shortcomings. They’re a part of your story but not necessarily definitions of who you are. What do you as a result of becoming aware of your perceptions, limits and flaws - that’s a different opportunity for growth. Inoffering criticism you open yourself to it as well - which is of equal value to you as the one who you’re offering it to.

Criticism, and open questioning has been a common theme in traditional yoga dialogues - and I’m not saying that traditional is necessarily best but I am saying that questioning has endured for a reason - I believe that reason to be that it has allowed yoga to evolve.  Questioning alignment in poses started as a criticism, questioning accepted philosophies started as a criticism. Different opinions aren’t bad - they’re just different. Let’s aspire to hold space for them.

Summary

What is it that we gain from keeping criticisms at bay and putting anger under siege?  Is it the feeling that yoga is a cure-all from discomfort? Does it allow us to hold to an unchecked power for our egos?  Are we afraid of the potential of anger to harm absolutely? I wonder if instead of avoiding or judging our anger and critical thoughts, if we used them as an opportunity to grow and transform what would we be able to gain?

What do you think? Do anger and criticism have a place in yoga spaces?

Meet Yin Yoga: The BFF practice for Athletes and Busy People that you totally have time to do

Originally Posted Oct 23, 2018 Written for The Chi Junky

If you search on social media for #yoga you’ll feast your eyes on complex arm balancing postures, gymnastic style handstands, twisting poses that almost appear to be optical illusions all set within the most aesthetically pleasing sceneries possible.  Challenging poses can be beautiful when they appear effortless.  Online, physically challenging poses satisfy our craving for laying eyes what a physical human body is capable of. Active vinyasa and asana is king of our online curiosity (Can I get a #yogaeverydamnday ?). 

With all the spotlight an active style yoga practice gets online, you might not realize he does have a younger sibling. She’s more of a wallflower, more likely to rest in the shadows.  You won’t find her on sunset beaches but in dimly lit studios doing her work.  She won’t take you through 26 poses in an hour but her minimalist sequence will be independently challenging. Her efforts aren’t as publicly celebrated in hashtags and photo ops but they yield amazing insights for the practitioner.  Make no mistake - she’s one powerful introvert. Her demands require not your physical strength but your steady attention.  She likes her alone time so she’ll only expect you to visit a couple times a week. She is yin yoga.

 Yin yoga doesn’t work at surface level.  Its poses are aesthetically similar to Hatha Yoga postures but unlike its fiery counterpart, Yin Yoga asks you to relax as much as possible into the pose - and then stay there for anywhere from 3 to 20 minutes.  These long, still, holds put stresses on the body’s joints and connective tissues (fascia) leading to increased flexibility, improved range of motion in joints, stimulating circulation as well as an opportunity for deep relaxation and meditation.  

Yin yoga is different from a Restorative Yoga class for the reason that in many practitioners there is a sensation involved in many poses from the passive stress of these tissues.  Restorative Yoga aims to make the body as comfortable as possible to find rest and relaxation (I often refer to Restorative Yoga as “Guided Nap Time”) whereas Yin Yoga aims for you to feel “productively uncomfortable” and use these sensations as a focal point for meditation (… well at least the way I teach it. :))

In most people, Yin Yoga is most beneficial when it is practiced no more than 1-2 times per week (so not as to over stress the tissues). Anecdotally, I've had students that are distance athletes credit incorporating regular yin yoga practice in their training schedule with shaving 5 minutes (!!!) off their half marathon race time. Busy students credit their yin practice with less tension related aches and pains and an effective stress relief practice. It's accessible for those who are otherwise active as it doesn't add hours to your weekly routine.

The longer holds in a yin yoga class provide you with time to fully experience a yoga practice on a level deeper than what is visible to others or to your camera. It's quality over quantity, substance over style. It doesn't stand in the spotlight but its charms are hidden in the shadows. Hang out with Yin Yoga from time to time and she'll teach you a lot about yourself.

Observing your Teacher and why their social media account doesn't matter as much as you think.

Recently, I had a teacher deliver an unintentional lecture on the guru / pupil relationship and the inherent flaws in upholding this multi-generational practice of modern yoga.  The lecture concluded with cautionary tales of what the latest disciplines had descended into the likes of dangerous cults.  

It's been no secret that yoga has had its fair share of controversies in these dynamics.  There are countless accounts of yoga-teachers-turned-yoga-criminals and well documented instances of the awakened leaders spiritually licensing themselves into massive corruption and dangerous acts (like in the Netflix documentary, Wild Wild Country on the rise and fall of Osho and his cult of disciples).

I've personally bore witness to a few accounts of abuses of power within the yoga class including racist commentary, unwanted touch that led to injury of my own body, and behaviour of teachers off the mat that made me question whether or not they actually practiced what they preached or were simply on a quest to be powerful in some respect of their lives.  I've fallen prey myself in my own enforcement of late policies until a student made it known that from the outside it seemed unnecessarily harsh (I'm not perfect).  All this to say that my bullshit radar (both of my own behaviour and others) has been markedly improved over the years as a result of dedicated focus and an unwavering interest in critical reflection and actively deciding to seek out another course of action.

After all the whole idea of yoga is union - not hierarchy, freedom - not dependence, discernment - not blind agreeability.

Despite the marketing of yoga teachers as "special" creatures that have elevated themselves to near-heaven-on-earth perceptions on their instagram accounts and in class poetry reads that doesn't make them anything more or less than humans.  After all the whole idea of yoga is union - not hierarchy, freedom - not dependence, discernment - not blind agreeability. All this questioning is a part of the process despite yoga's marketing as a panacea for self-help, fitness and wellness adjunct to the sales of kombucha, matcha, and t-shirts touting one's ability to wish themselves into a mermaid. (No judgements if you're into becoming a mermaid.. I like my legs just fine, though).  This narrative only emphasizes yoga as a method for self-advancement instead of a practice of self-connection which further muddies the waters in how to identify a teacher in service to their students instead of a teacher in service to their self-image. (Honestly - this could be a whole different post in an of itself...)

If yoga has taught me anything, it's that for every piece of light there is a shadow - and this might just be a shadow of becoming a powerful teacher.

Here is what I've learned in the quest of not only examining my own conduct in class but also from the wisdom of teachers more experienced.

Questions I now ask myself in evaluating teachers patterns of behaviour as well as my own:

1. Do the other practitioners in class seem balanced?
   • Is there worship of the teacher amongst their students?  Is this adoration encouraged by the teacher?
   • Do students rationalize behaviour of the teacher in a "they could do no wrong" manner?
   • Does the teacher encourage dependency on them to deliver yoga / spiritual advice?
   • Does the teacher encourage pain as gain?
   • Does the teacher emphasize a narrative that they know students bodies better than the students do?
2. Does the teacher have good boundaries?
   • If you tell them no, do they undermine your answer with negotiating? Do they undermine other no's like attempting handstands or headstands when a student is hesitant?
   • Does the teacher actively tell you what to think?  How do they react when questioned? 
   • Do they engage in name calling or belittling of students practices?
   • Do they assert that they hold the answers even though the questions are outside the boundaries of a yoga practice?
   • Are they more concerned with the aesthetics of any given pose rather than the benefit to the practitioner? (i.e. forcing "fuller" expressions)
3. Is the teacher open to student feedback?
   • Are students that question the teacher asked not to come back to class?
   • Are students that question the teacher belittled?
   • Does the teacher remain open to student's experiences?  (i.e. if you were able to tell a teacher that something made you uncomfortable - how do they react?)
4. What does your gut say?
   • Do they make you uncomfortable?
   • Is their a climate of punishment / reward amongst students?
   • Are there sales pitches in lieu of answering straightforward questions?
   • Do they take credit for your accomplishments on the mat? Spiritually?

Information that doesn't really matter - but outside influence might tell you that it does:

1. How physically flexible / fit / attractive your teacher is.
2. How rich or popular your teacher is.
3. Whether or not your teacher owns a studio.
4. How many instagram followers your teacher has.
5. How many lifestyle brand sponsorships your teacher has.

Remember...

Although instagram, popularity, and clout in a yoga community might be a flagpole to draw people into the practice of yoga, authenticity and selfless service are really what a teaching practice is about.  Questioning a teacher is an important part of that teacher's growth as much as for the growth of the student. If critical thought and discernment aren't welcome - what education can you receive?  What kind of growth will a teacher make over time without challenge or prompting from a student?

What ultimately makes a teacher is students.  If no one shows up to be taught the teacher isn't made.  Who you practice with will ultimately mold your practice - be selective in your teachers.  Spend time in their classes and get to know them before entrusting them with influence on your yoga practice.  As always - if something trips your radar that isn't listed in this post - listen to your intuition.  If it doesn't feel right, it might just be wrong.

Leave it as it is.

I was 60 minutes into my last Escents Aromatherapy Yin class at YYoga. “In the the fight or flight response adrenaline is the hormone that tells your legs it’s time to run or kick…” I softly said as I headed towards the front of the room just as I sensed the studio door behind me briskly swing open. As I took my next breath to finish my thought I heard a voice yell “I’m sorry but we have to evacuate.”

Fittingly, the multiple aromatherapy diffusers had masked the smell of a potential gas leak in the building and while it can pay of to take risks for happiness, seldom is taking risks ever prudent for safety. The manager emphatically told us to leave everything except our personal belongings as we shuffled out of the room.

Still half in a meditative state, the entire class got up quietly to walk away as we left our mats and blankets and shuffled outside as the fire department walked up the stairs to the studio. We left the comfort of our cozy yin castles to venture out into about a foot of snow and ice that had covered the streets of downtown Toronto. The winds had kicked up to a howl – a far cry from the relaxing singing bowls and flute music that had lulled us into relaxation mere moments ago.

A few students and I quipped outside about how nice it would have been to finish the class but we were all in it (or out of it) together understanding that no matter what we wanted, we had to go. We had to walk away no matter how tough it might have been to leave everything unfinished, open and unresolved. No arguments – no discussions. Out of the comfort zones, into the unknown…

On the surface it was calm and effortless – on the inside there was a storm of anxiety rippling underneath me. I was leaving a group of people who had supported me for a year – who were patient with my growth as a teacher, who took time out of their Sundays to learn together. I was afraid. Not of the weather, the gas or the immediate danger surrounding me – of walking away without saying anything. I wanted to fill this discomfort with words. I wanted to soothe myself that the transition would be seamless and easy – it wasn’t.

I was uncomfortable. I wanted to fight to stay here even though I knew I needed to leave. I struggled leaving the comfort of the space I had built. I wanted to run sometimes from the idea that I was letting people down. I panicked over how to say goodbye for weeks before settling on a few words of appreciation. I worried about how to express the gratitude I had for those who decided to take a risk in spending their time with me. How vulnerable yin yoga makes us as teachers just as much as they do our students. I wanted to leave our goodbyes to happily ever after… not a cliff hanger without a sequel.

Now when I reflect on going out without a “bang” (pun very much intended), I realize it was perfectly befitting. It was perfect as it is. I had created space in this room and left it there untouched, unresolved. Perfectly ready to receive whatever happened the week after. Without filling the discomfort with goodbyes, and meanings – I had left it open and full of potential as to what would happen next… I wouldn’t know where it would take us but I knew I had left something here. I had left it as it is – silent – ready for the next voice to fill it’s space.

Feeding Savasana: Are teachers and studios spiritually licensing photographs?

I remember vividly my early days practicing yoga.  I had a close family member taking a downward turn in health with a chronic illness that found me identifying with many roles that required I keep my shit together at all times... working professional in a fast paced environment, competitive recreational athlete, emotional support for the primary caregiver of my family member.  I was stressed but I kept my shit together. I would do yoga primarily for stress relief (and hey who doesn't like to de-stress while cross training).

I would sweat and grunt my way through awkward movements.  My normally stoic facial expression contorted much like my tense and tight physique into strange and unusual shapes - but it was cool, I was anonymous.  None of my friends or colleagues were into this "hippy shit "- I could really let my hair down without fear of running into a colleague during my "me time" unlike when I would go to the gym.  I was uninterrupted by the lure of my ever present smart phone - part of the appeal of the whole exercise.

At the end of our hour and a half together I remember the windowless room lulling into a pitch black darkness with only a small ray of light entering through the door.  The teacher would coo about the importance of corpse pose to integrate the work we've done in our bodies encouraging us to be as still as possible to really let it all sink in.  I would squirm because I knew as soon as the stillness came the tidal wave would hit - an uncontrollable urge to cry.   I wasn't a cryer in my mind - but after a while... damn if it didn't feel good to finally not have to keep it all together for everyone else all the time.  No one else knew because they couldn't see it.  I could let it all go because I had that time, that space to do it.  My environment had given me permission.

Studios and teachers alike make such great efforts not only to market the experience of yoga but also to create that environment that give us that permission to experience the "let go." We usually don't allow our students to bring cell phones into classes let alone film their yoga practice for their instagram feeds.  We ask permission before giving a hands on assist.  We do our best to create a sanctuary for whatever their individual needs are, whether that's sweaty drips or teary ones. Why can't we then as teachers let go of our need to create content for that hour?  Why don't we afford our students the ability to opt-out of mid class live streams?  Does our need to hustle and market the yoga practices we deliver supersede our students needs for space and privacy in our public classes?  Have we as yoga teachers spiritually licensed ourselves to make exceptions to our own actions?  Do we need to add a line about "we reserve the right to film your savasana and use it for our promotional purposes" in our studio waivers?

Often when I have casual conversations about it, it's met with the pressures that studios and teachers feel they need to market themselves 24/7, that the ends of having more people practice justify the means of posting pictures of people without their permission or simply the question of "no one can tell who they are, they're just people lying down". Our cultural obsession with the virtual reality and how it acknowledges and validates us has lessened our focus on the reality happening right in front of us - Every student's individual experience.  We don't know when we snap that pic what is underneath the surface of those flaked out bods just as we don't know what's underneath the surface when we go do adjust someone's shoulders.  Could be years of traumatic experiences and injuries, could be a passing low moment at the end of a hard day, could be that they would love a photo as acknowledgement of their hard work in class.  The fact of the question remains, are we creating a sanctuary for them to feel safe inside our space or are we spiritually licensing ourselves to make the call use their private moments for our own motives?  Do our intentions as teachers and online presences line up with those of our subjects and students?

What do you think? Are we given permission to our students or are we taking permission for ourselves?  Is it necessary to self-identify as having permission to post to create that space in the online reality too? How do you go about this?

The Truth About Yoga and Weight Management

{Hey I’m a yoga teacher not a medical professional – if you’re trying to lose/gain weight, making adjustments to your diet or lifestyle including a new yoga practice you should always consult your doctor first. Ok?}

As a hot yoga teacher, I can’t tell you how many times people come up to me and ask me if yoga’s going to result in weight loss or if they’re going to gain more muscle mass. “How many calories do you think this class burned?” is might as well be a Power or Flow FAQ.  I can tell you – there aren’t very many yoga teachers that like addressing the topic, myself included.  The topic of weight can bring up a lot of reactions in both teachers and students alike.

Now you might assume because I’ve written this post I’m advocating for a “one size for everyone” yoga body which is NOT AT ALL where I’m coming from here.  If you’re concerned, your health is something only a qualified medical professional can truly evaluate (not a yoga teacher).    Athletes and healthy bodies come in ALL shapes and sizes.  Baseball players, wrestlers, basketball players, golfers, tennis pros, and long distance runners all look completely different.  Can you tell based on looks how good someone’s blood pressure is? No.  I’ve looked ripped at the expense of my health (hello coffee instead of sleep and diet soda instead of food!). I have more body fat now and I’m definitely happier.  Healthy happens on the inside – aesthetics are a poor measure in my line of work of one’s fitness or spiritual capacity.

So that brings us back to our original theme – how does yoga help if you’re looking to manage your weight?

Yoga is a stress buster. Have you ever emotionally eaten before?  I have… And it makes sense why too.  Acute stressors activate the sympathetic nervous system – the fight or flight response in the body which suppresses digestion and appetite in the short term and increases muscle tension to help you to run in a survival situation (not as useful when you get a “shit-o-gram” from your boss but evolution doesn’t have an I.T. call in centre). If you’re a meal skipper, watch your reactions to acutely stressful situations. Chronic stress elevates cortisol (a stress hormone) levels making your body’s natural response to seek sugar and fats in preparation for famine (a chronic stressor to our ancestors before the advent of Loblaws).  If you want to eat cupcakes and PB and J at every meal – don’t beat yourself up.  If you’re too stressed to remember to eat meals everyday – don’t be frustrated. Look to find a way to treat yourself to some de-stress time – and yoga’s a great way to do that (yes even low calorie burns like restorative or yin, even with cupcakes and PB and J).  You’ll find the less stressed you are, the easier it becomes to find balance.

Yoga helps get you in touch with your body. I remember when I first started practicing there was always a cue to “listen to your body.”  My reaction would always be not to listen but to think about how my body feels.  Have you ever eaten when you’re not feeling hungry?  Have you ever not eaten when you’re feeling hungry?  It’s because “mind”.  Your mind can talk you into pretty much anything if you aren’t aware of it.  Yoga is mind-body exercise that will help you to decipher what is mind and what is body and instead of pitting one against the other (mind says eat when body says I’m good thanks, body says eat mind says I’m good thanks).   By getting in touch with how your body feels, you’ll notice how it responds to exercise, what you eat, and the other stuff that comes up in your life and satisfy your own unique needs when it comes to your choices.  Get your mind and body working together you’ll experience way more balance, way less inner turmoil, and generally be happier whatever happens or doesn’t happen for you in life.

Yoga reminds you to see reality as it is, not as your mind interprets it. Remember that our associations, reactions and attitudes to do with weight are programmed into us by society – nothing more nothing less.  Dogs and cats don’t get bummed about their weight – they get bummed when they perceive that they don’t feel good.  The reality is your weight doesn’t dictate your worth as a human being and whatever your body shape is there’s an example proving just that (my personal fave was Adele saying “Music is made for ears not for eyes”).  At the end of the day, objectively you’re looking to adjust the relativity of your mass to gravity’s pull (that’s actually what weight is!).  Maybe you’re looking to improve your health, maybe you like looking a certain way.  Whatever your reasons or intentions are for making a change you have the option to find ways to not suffer in the process. Make sure your choices are what’s right for you and take the shame out of feeling like you “should” be a certain way to fit society’s mold.

Yoga helps you enjoy the present moment. At the end of the day being happy and enjoying what you’re doing will help you no matter where you are in your process (regardless of whether that’s aesthetic, health or weight centred).  If you’re able to enjoy what you are doing right here and now, you’ll be able to find ease no matter how much your process may challenge you.  Practising being fully in the moment on the mat, will help you be fully in the moment in your life.  Less impulsiveness will mean you are operating out of a place higher than survival (remember that fight of flight we talked about earlier?) be better equipped to love yourself no matter what, and get connected to what makes you truly amazing – your spirit.

Your Starter Guide to 3 Key Chakras, Yin Yoga and Essential Oils

{I’m a yoga teacher not a medical professional – as always ask your doctor before starting any exercise, stretching, wellness routine or aromatherapy program!}

Anyone who has been to one of my Saje Aromatherapy Yin yoga classes knows I like to talk about chakras… a lot.  My love affair with the chakras has been a life long one – always mystified by the mental and spiritual connections experienced by physical tension in the body (why are my hips so tight!? why does my jaw clench all the time?!) it wasn’t until I discovered Yin Yoga with friend and mentor Ashely Holly that I really experienced how essential oils can relax our minds and give us some headspace to start working through our tensions so we can look clearly at ourselves from the inside out.  This self-discovery can happen with or without these oils (or with yoga at all some might argue) but if you’ve ever wondered “Why is this lady putting this stuff on my head?” and what affect this might have on your energy centres then this is the blog post for you!

A chakra is an energy centre, usually anchored on clusters of nerve ganglia – it’s not a physical thing but rather an energy centre associated with a physical centre of the body – much like meridians in Traditional Chinese Medicine.  Depending on who you talk to about chakras you’ll get a bunch of different answers on what a charka is.  Basically it’s a connector between the physical and the energetic body. To achieve optimal energy – the practitioner aims to find balance in the chakras – not too open not too closed.  The idea is to find the “Goldilocks” (just right) state of energy.

Traditionally in meditation, incense was used to ground the mind through the senses. In my sphere of influence – I like to use essential oils in much the same way.  Smell is a powerful sense – one that we have mostly become unaware of as we don’t use it in day to day life as much as our ancestors did when seeking out food (now it’s limited to “Is this milk off?” haha).  You can use smell and scent to ground the various chakras as well.

This guide will use the Saje Aromatherapy’s Pocket Farmacy – which is a great starter kit that we use in our Saje Aromatherapy Yin classes and the core chakras that can be balanced using the kit.  Don’t use aromatherapy without consulting a physician first as there are contraindications for pregnant women as well as those with certain health conditions and allergies:

1st Chakra – Muladhara: Connected to the right to exist and the elements necessary for survival. Located at the base of the spine in the pelvis.

Pocket Farmacy Blend – Peppermint Halo:  This oil blend contains Vetvier which is used to ground all the chakras (or energy centres in the body). It’s the base or ground in which that all of your energies stand on! Grounding is always easiest when you can get out of your mind and into your body – soak in the smell and focus your attention there. Use it along your hairline or at the temples – keep it away from your eyes!

Yin Yoga Pose: Toe stretch.  Balancing your feet that are the base connector for your body to the earth.

3rd Chakra – Manipura: Connected to the elements of the will. Located in the solar plexus, navel. Linked to digestion as it transforms the physical (food) into the energetic (energy).

Pocket Farmacy Blend – Eater’s Digest: The eater’s digest blend contains mint oils helping to ease digestion. Mint is one of those “just right oils” – as it’s both cooling and warming. It stimulates the flow of prana or chi in the body and is said to enhance positive self image (who doesn’t feel great when they’re minty fresh?).  Use it on your belly (not in it!) rolling from the top of your ribs on the left drawing a square without a lid down to the navel line, across the belly button and straight up to the right rib.

Yin Yoga Pose: Twisted Roots.  Supine or reclined twists are well documented as digestion move along-ers and manipura stimulators.

4th Chakra – Anahata:  Connected to the elements of love, compassion, grief and sadness. Located in the heart / chest centre it’s connected most often in the west to relationships.

Pocket Farmacy Blend – Immune:  This little guy contains Rosemary.  Rosemary is typically associated with Ajna (6th chakra) but it’s also relevant for the Heart Centre as it’s said to promote spiritual understanding – enhancing the connection of one’s self to all of that around it. Use it by rolling from the inner wrist through the shoulder across the chest and down the other side.  Connecting the left energies (yin) and right energies (yang) of the body to find connectedness and balance when opposites connect.

Yin Yoga Pose – Supported Fish: Opening the heart centre by providing a propped backbone with a bolster, supported fish always reminds us that the earth has our back so we can open our hearts!

As with any yoga practice, bells and whistles aren’t necessary – just a body and breath. Sometimes we can use the tools provided by aromatherapy to set our mind to a more receptive state allowing us to ground it in an experience or happening – be it aromatherapy oils, a sound, or a physical experience.  If you have questions, please don’t hesitate to reach out!  What has your experience been with aromatherapy and yoga?

Slow is the New ASAP: How Slow Yoga is Challenging AF

[HEY I’M NOT A DOCTOR OR PERSONAL TRAINER, JUST A YOGA TEACHER WHO LIKES EXPRESSING HER OPINION SO IT’S ALWAYS WISE TO CHECK WITH YOUR DOCTOR AND HEALTHCARE TEAM BEFORE STARTING, ADJUSTING A YOGA PRACTICE OR TAKING ON EXERCISES.  MAKING CHANGES TO YOUR PRACTICE SHOULD BE DONE UNDER THE SUPERVISION OF QUALIFIED PROFESSIONALS (YOUR YOGA TEACHER INCLUDED) TO MAKE SURE THEY SUIT WHERE YOU’RE AT. I’D DOUBLE UNDERLINE THIS IF YOU’VE GOT AN INJURY OR PRE-EXISTING MEDICAL CONDITION. GOT IT?]

Ever been in a Power class that put the brakes on your pace?  Here are some good reasons why practicing yoga SLOW really helps to ACCELERATE your practice:

You have to focus on your alignment – and your body will remember when you move fast.

Although whipping through a Vinyasa (Down dog, Plank, Chaterunga, Up Dog / Down Dog) might get your heart pumping – if you’re not totally dialed into our form the heart pump might come at a cost to your alignment.  If your alignment goes, chances are your ability to practice without injury will too.

Slowing your practice down affords you more time to be disciplined and articulate in your form because you’re not just trying to keep up, race back to downward dog (I see you!), or anticipate the next movement.  You’re allowed to be in the pose – fully… and transition – fully with your attention in tow.

Every time you practice, you teach your body how to move.  If you slow it right down you will build valuable memories in those muscles of good form that you can call on in your race to the downward dog later in the week.  You gotta walk before you can run (and yoga is no different).

You build strength by taking momentum out of the equation and challenging yourself to slow down.

The exercise principle “Time Under Tension” theorizes that when you slow down resistance activity (like for instance lowering through chaterunga, holding for a pause or two) you stimulate hormones that will help you to build strength and muscle tissue.  This stimulation occurs by increasing the difficulty of the exercise by removing any momentum. Now, there are definitely more variables at play that’ll determine the amount of strength or muscle you build (diet, blood sugar, hormones, genetics etc…) but slowing down will INCREASE the perceived difficulty of your practice.

I should say – there isn’t bulletproof scientific evidence that slow = muscles.  Anecdotally though I can tell you – a slow practice is definitely an advanced one – and part of that is just that it’s pretty hard to slow down when you’re in “get shit done ASAP” mode all day.

Slowing down can be a workout for your ego alone. In my own experience, after years of practice I realized I wasn’t strong enough to do a simple vinyasa without modifying when I was challenged slow things down.  When I went back to a fast paced vinyasa class it felt like a walk in the park.

Wonder what that might do if you slowed down during your life… Might be something to this “slowing down” crap, eh?

You increase your ability to focus by adding a meditative quality to your practice (and it’s still challenging).

I’m not a believer in multitasking at all but this is one area where I actually think it’s possible…

If you are able to slow down your practice you deliver a meditative quality to a physically demanding practice.  You are able to do hard stuff more easily just due to the fact that you are relaxed.  You have more time to INHALE FULLY and EXHALE FULLY instead of being in the race.  You have more time to feel and focus on the feeling of breath over time – which in conventional faster vinyasa classes can be overlooked when we practice simply trying only to keep up.  Slow down the movement, slow down your breath. Slow down your breath, slow down your mind – meditation.

Easy peasy right? No. By no means am I saying that when you’re new to slow Power your inner dialogue will immediately shut off and you’ll start levitating to the front of your mat – lost in the music of your own lungs.  It takes time – but in each practice you can afford yourself that time it’ll pay off.

By practicing slow power yoga, you’ll find fast classes feel easier, you’ll build good form, and you’ll notice during other challenging life situations you might have built the “muscle memory” of being really really present. If you’re able to slow down, be disciplined during challenge on your mat, chances are you’ll be able to do the same when you’re presented challenges in your life.  

Moving slow will give you the strength to move really fast when life calls for quick action – but instead of with momentum you can move quickly with ease.